Thu 9 Aug 2007
BlogHer & Feminism, A Few Stray Thoughts
Posted by Liza under Personal
Every time I think about writing about BlogHer07, the first thing I want to do is acknowledge all the amazing people I met, besides the ones I’ve already acknowledged.
Then I get scared that I’m going to forget someone.
Then BOOM, I don’t want to write it, because I don’t want to be the person who makes someone else feel bad.
That said, I’m writing anyway and the only other people I’m going to acknowledge right now are real life friend Cindy, with whom I had a wonderful dinner and time catching up on Thursday, and Katie, who asked the bravest question in my panel and with whom I also hung out while waiting for coffee in the lobby of the W at 5:30 am on Friday. Watching Katie’s little daughter climb up and down from the W chairs made me miss Noah, in a good way.
I met and talked to lots of other cool people, some of whom were already online friends and others who were new to me, but most of you are going to be saved up for future in-context links. I hope you don’t mind.
What I really wanted to talk about here was the large number of explicitly feminist bloggers, and what that made me think about for myself.
I don’t call myself a feminist blogger, although certainly I am both a feminist and a blogger, and sometimes I blog about feminist issues.
What does it mean to be a “feminist blogger?” Is it only for so-called political blogs? In my mind, I mostly think about the people who enjoy having big blog comment fights with conservatives.
“Should” I call myself a feminist blogger?
Or does that label actually get in the way of the human to human connections that are what I think makes this blogging experience special? Labels can be useful, but they can also create walls, and by focusing on my experiences, I think I’ve connected with people in the blogosphere who don’t have many other friends or acquaintances who are lesbian moms — people who might find excessive labeling less welcoming.
On the other hand, I put myself out there about who my family and I are because I think it makes a difference in the world for you, the reader, to see a real picture of the sometimes boring life of a lesbian mom. Maybe it would make a difference too, for you to more explicitly see that feminist context.
On the third hand (*grin*) maybe that can be true and also not my responsibility or issue. But maybe that’s a cop-out.
I don’t have any life-changing conclusions here, just meandering thoughts. I’m curious to hear your thoughts, though.
August 10th, 2007 at 12:14 am
Given that you already deploy the culturally loaded labels “southern” “lesbian” and “mommmy” (and the somewhat less loaded, but still richly connotative “thirtysomething” and “blogger”) I think you’ve already crossed the “to label or not to label” line.
As I see it, the only word in your header up there that *isn’t* a label is “unexpectedly.”
Might as well add “feminist” since that’s as much — if not more — a part of who you are.
August 10th, 2007 at 6:15 am
i’m not seeing the practical impact of deciding whether you are a “feminist blogger” or not. is it just for formatting your blog layout? for the bio for the next conference panel you are on?
i don’t think it really matters whether you call yourself a feminist blogger or not, you should call yourself that if you want, or don’t if it doesn’t feel right. i think it’s “not what you say, it’s what you do.” if you are a feminist blogger, that is going to show up in your blog and it doesn’t matter what you call yourself. there’s really nothing to be gained by labeling yourself. but there’s really nothing to be lost either.
but i’m really not a person who is into labels.
August 10th, 2007 at 8:00 am
I think one of the reasons tihs is weighing in right now is the way that blogHer focused so heavily on writing niches as a way to drive more traffic etc. I heard so many times “no one will read if you don’t narrow your focus” I don’t want to narrow my focus. My blog is about me, and I’m all over the place. (Besides, I don’t really believe that anyway.)
I don’t really think there’s any gain to labeling yourself as a feminist. i also don’t think there’s any harm to it. As Jen said - if it’s you, it willl show up anyway.
And hey, thanks for the link and the nice words. I am so glad we got to hang out together a bit.
August 10th, 2007 at 8:15 am
I’m with Jen. Your blog “ain’t broke” so no need to fix it.
August 10th, 2007 at 11:15 am
You know, you add enough labels and you weaken the impact of any one of them… it’s like the difference between tomato-basil soup and gaspacho… one strikes an elegant, clean note that tastes exactly the way it sounds like it would taste, while the other is a medley of flavors where the sum is greater than the parts and beyond what the name would necessarily imply (I’ve never had two gaspachos that tasted exactly the same).
Frankly, my dear, you’ve already got a good gaspacho going, why hesitate at adding in some chopped avocado? Or, actually, just admitting that your gaspacho already includes avocado.
That’ll have 3 effects: some people will spit out your soup shuddering to themselves ew! avocado! I didn’t realize this soup had avocado in it, I can’t keep eating this now! (much the way I react when I’m happily eating something and someone chooses to inform me that there’s mayonnaise in it) or people just bowsing the buffet will notice the sign and think to themselves, hmmm, avocado, that’s what I’m in the mood for, someone who’s not afraid to incorporate the alligator-pear, I gotta get me some of that! or 3, those of us who already read you and appreciate what you have to say will just look look puzzled and murmer but… hasn’t there been avocado in here all along? I thought it was obvious that there was avocado here. No? Huh. What did people think the green chunks were, then? In other words, it might get you new readers, it might offend away some current or potential readers (but are they so important that you need to cloak your blog for them — as a conscious choice NOT to call yourself what you are would be) but it’s not likely to affect the people who already read and love you.
Of course, the debate to label or not to label oneself “feminist” is already such a weighted debate. How many times have you heard, or read, a phrase that starts, “I’m not a feminist, but…” and that just bugs me, if I’m going to be completely honest here.
August 10th, 2007 at 1:15 pm
“Am I ______ enough?”
a) feminist
b) lesbian
c) gender-bending
d) environmentalist
e) internet security geeky
My personal list of questions that I’ve asked myself (or been asked by others) goes on.
Over the years I’ve pretty much decided that labels aren’t for me. One of the most poignant experiences I’ve had in this area of self-discovery was on the message boards for the Michigan Womyn’s Music Festival.
As with any population of humans, the readership of those boards contained a full spectrum of social and political viewpoints.
The default topic of discussion is the vague “don’t ask don’t tell” policy at the festival gates regarding whether or not one identifies as a “wom[a]n born wom[a]n”. Those not identifying as such can be barred from entrance, even if they’re in possession of a paid ticket. It is not a policy that I agree with, but I have chosen to attend the festival anyway, on 3 separate occasions. Many choose to boycott or join a protest gathering nearby.
In my discussions with people about this policy, I have been called a “pawn of the patriarchy”, and have encountered many individuals who have (imho) swung themselves out to the far edge of the spectrum opposite of what they are fighting against, which is not a good thing (imho).
I suppose one of the primary reasons that I avoid labels, is to avoid the tendency for labels (and movements) to be defined by their extremists. It is not the margins of a movement that define the movement, but the sum total of change enacted by all who participate in it, whether they identify themselves as part of it or not.
August 10th, 2007 at 3:07 pm
So many interesting thoughts!
Jen & Grandma, there\’s probably no practical impact. Maybe it affects my answer to the question, \”What do you blog about?\” KT, it had never even occured to me that it might be a traffic strategy!
Kate, I wonder if what made me start this whole thought process is that whole, \”Am I feminist enough?\” conversation in my own head.
Trista, I love the feminist as avocado analogy. In fact, Reno, that bit made me realize that you\’re right, nearly all of those \”as fundamental as breathing air\” labels, which would include feminist, are left implicit here in the blog.
What I mean is that I don\’t blog about being a progressive or a liberal, about being a feminist, about being a leader.
And in thinking about that, what I\’m realizing is that there\’s nothing really for me to blog about in those areas. I don\’t experience them as areas of life where the exercise of exploring them in writing is particularly interesting. Just like I hardly ever blog about breathing air. The bibliophile label is borderline, and might explain why I go so long between posting book reviews. (One is coming next week, though.)
In contrast, being an unexpectedly southern lesbian mommyblogger demands my intellectual attention, and I enjoy giving it. I feel like I\’m regularly saying something that contributes to a cultural conversation I want to be having.
August 12th, 2007 at 10:11 am
i guess it’s part of my laziness (that’s one label i accept for myself), but i don’t bother thinking about things with no practical impact.
anyhoo, it sounds like you figured out what you want to do so that’s good.
i disagree with the BlogHer proposition that niching yourself will get you more readers. i have no doubt that niche blogs are easier to get an audience for, all other things being equal. i know this to be true from having a separate knitting blog. but i think changing your blog to get you more readers will get you fewer regular readers, though it may increase the number of unique visitors. and it goes without saying that there are a lot of very popular non-niche blogs (wil wheaton comes immediately to mind).
i don’t know if they talked about this at BlogHer, but i think people should think about quality of readers, not just quantity. unless your sole goal is to get hits, you want readers who are getting out of your blog what you want them to get out of it, and hopefully becoming regular readers. not just checking you out and then wandering away without being affected by what you wrote.