Thu 27 Mar 2008
That Line? Crossed. So Crossed.
Posted by Liza under Personal, The Real Live Boy
Jill called me tonight as she was getting ready to put Noah to bed.
Over dinner, they talked about who is friends at day care are. (Awwwwwwwwwe.)
Then she asked about his teachers.
Noah got quiet.
“Is Miss So-And-So one of your teachers?”
Noah answered.
“Miss So-And-So scary.”
Scary!
Jill pressed for details, which Noah did not provide.
But the same Miss So-And-So was the subject of a “we used to go there but our kid was terrorized” horror story I heard over dinner out a couple of weeks ago.
I think that we have 6+ months to figure out WTF to do with day care for Baby Blur, and in the mean time, Noah cannot stay at this SCARY day care where he gets f*ing INJURED. TWICE. In one week.
In the mean time, I’ll try not to cry until I get home.
March 27th, 2008 at 7:34 pm
Awwww. He did very good in telling. He should get extra ice cream or something.
March 27th, 2008 at 7:52 pm
Oh, Liza. I am so sorry. And especially that you are so far away right now. Hang in there and hugs to all three of you.
March 27th, 2008 at 8:09 pm
Oh God! I’m so sorry.
My two cents - Nanny. We love Maxim’s nanny.
March 27th, 2008 at 9:09 pm
Good for him for telling, but this has got to be so hard. *hugs*
March 27th, 2008 at 11:35 pm
Thanks for the hugs and sympathy, everyone. I cannot WAIT to get home tomorrow.
Unfortunately, Nanny doesn’t work when you have a work-from-home parent. There is just no way we could make that work.
March 28th, 2008 at 7:11 am
Don’t rule out a nanny so quickly. Jason works from home half of the time, and he and Folake manage to work around each other very effectively.
March 28th, 2008 at 8:48 am
That just makes me sick. Get Noah out of there asap and report what he said — something is NOT right. Huge hugs for the little guy and you & Jill.
March 28th, 2008 at 9:48 am
I agree with your sis, if you have a good nanny he/she can Noah & newborn entertained & occupied so that they are not interrupting your wife’s workday. As long as Noah understands that the person chosen is going to be his disciplinary figure during the day (which may require a short adjustment period for all) there shouldn’t be any real problems. Good luck no matter which you decide on.
March 28th, 2008 at 10:39 am
Poor little guy. Kid’s should never be ‘afraid’ at day care. Not to mention the cost of good day care these days … IF there is such a thing! It’s also totally understandable that both mamas have to work so staying home to care for Noah and Baby Blur is not an option either … how about a Nanny? Surely the cost of a good nanny wouldn’t be any worse than the cost of day care, then both kids could stay in a home environment and with todays technology you can go to work AND keep an eye on what’s going on at home via Nanny Cams.
March 28th, 2008 at 11:48 am
Oh how awful! Definitely time to get him out of there. And report it. If they’re lisenced you can call in a report and send someone out there to investigate. It sounds like Miss So-and-so needs to find a new career. And the director isn’t so hot, either.
I agree that a nanny may be something you could look harder at. I mean, if you say it won’t work then I’ll believe you, but I also know of people who work from home who have made an in-home nanny situation work for them. It usually involves an office that can be shut off so the working parent is in their own space and the kids can accept that the working parent isn’t available. But if you don’t have space in your house for a separate office, then a nanny wouldn’t be very workable.
sittercity.com might be a good place to start looking for nannies.
or then there’s this place
http://www.qualitycareforchildren.org/
in case you haven’t been to this Atlanta Child Care Resource and Referral site before…
March 28th, 2008 at 2:55 pm
That noise you hear is the sound of my heart breaking.
I work from home most of the time and we have a nanny. It took some adjusting for me (much moreso than for the nanny or for John!) but now we have a good rhythm. I don’t get distracted from my job, they don’t get distracted by me (unless it’s necessary) and it sure beats having to drop the boy off somewhere else, wonder what’s going on all day, and cotton to someone else’s schedule. If you do decide you want to think more about the nanny idea, you are more than welcome to pick my brain about my experience.
Regardless, I am sending warm (i.e. non-scary) thoughts to you all.
March 28th, 2008 at 7:52 pm
Thanks, everybody, for all your feedback and support.
Unfortunately, given the combination of the layout of our house and the highly sensitive nature of Jill’s work, the only way we could make a nanny work is if we were to move to a house with a completely different layout. Or if Jill were to change careers, which is also not on the table at this point.
Chicory, thanks for reminding me about that link! We spent a lot of time on that site before Noah was born — I think it’s time to go back. We are also brainstorming other possibilities.
March 28th, 2008 at 9:57 pm
:(
That is just sad and scary. I agree with you about the nanny. I did that for a year while working from home. It was just very hard. And I imagine if my work were more sensitive (i.e. if I were a therapist) that it would be completely unworkable. Good luck finding a solution.
March 29th, 2008 at 1:56 am
Oh. My. Gosh.
I’m so sorry!!!!
Our daycare experiences ticked me off enough & I don’t *think* any of the teachers ever scared Noodle (but she’s too young to tell me). She was never upset to be left there, but I never realized HOW happy she was to be picked up every day.
Since the last less than joyous experience, we decided that she needed to be at home & J has become a SAHD. We’ve seen a 180degree turn with her (attitude, sleeping, eating). It’s taken a lot of adjustments, but I know that we made the right decision for our family.
I hate how hard it is to find good, stable, quality CARE for babies - especially considering how stinkin expensive it is!!
March 29th, 2008 at 9:48 am
There is also the option of in-home day care at the provider’s home. I don’t know your licensing situation in Georgia; here they are not, but there is a local child advocacy group that runs a registry of in-home day care providers who have gone through criminal background checks, drug tests and home safety visits. Adam loves his sitter, who loves all the children like they’re her own. I think the one-on-one attention has been great for him, plus it’s cheaper than a center.
March 31st, 2008 at 1:39 pm
Ditto to what Carrie said. We use an in-home daycare and couldn’t be happier. I consider her family. She is licensed and has to jump through lots of hoops for the county. I like the consistency of one main provider (plus 2 assistants who have also been there a long time). I found her on one of the local parent listservs here in DC. Perhaps there is a similar one in your area.
Hang in there.
March 31st, 2008 at 7:34 pm
Perhaps a nanny might be possible if there are some shared office spaces available that would work for Jill, at a fairly cheap price’in the commerical areas nearby? There are such options in our area where a business has extra space and would rather rent cheap than have vacant, but of course I have no idea whether such exist in your neck of the woods.
I feel so bad for Noah–both the scary part and the cast. Give him hugs and kisses and tickles for me.
Love, Grandma