So here’s the thing: Noah is choo-choo obsessed.

Airplanes and other things with engines are interesting, but the first word out of his mouth most mornings is choo-choo, and it is with sobbing reaches towards the choo-choos that we take him upstairs at night. He takes a choo-choo into the bath, in the car, in the stroller, to Sunday school, to have his diaper changed — absolutely everywhere he goes. When we drive past choo-choos, Noah gets superexcited, and when they’re gone, he whines for “more choo-choo?”

The only thing that can reliably distract Noah from a choo-choo is the sight of an actual airplane flying overhead.

Those of you who have known me for a long time may find this funny. Ironic, even. And you probably understand my vague, very low-level, unease with this particular obsession.

To the rest of you, it probably just sounds like a cute toddler obsession, which indeed it is.

But you see, once upon a time, I truly believed that I was going to get married to a man.

And that man was choo-choo obsessed.

His choo-choo obsession manifested itself a little bit differently than Noah’s — for example, he called them trains all the time, where Noah only does that about half the time. And he liked to read and write dense law review articles about choo-choo economics and legal issues. Noah only likes to read books with pictures of choo-choos.

And Noah’s paltry dozen actual choo-choos can’t even begin to compare with my ex’s 30,000 cars, mostly put together himself from modeling kits, and hand painted with a painstaking commitment to precise historical accuracy. Plus, Noah has never yet gone on a road trip for the express purpose of taking pictures of trains.

What they do have in common is the age at which the obsession began. You see, my ex has (or had) an audiotape of himself as a toddler. He didn’t speak any English, but even allowing for the fact that he was speaking in toddler Italian, the portion of the tape in which he talked about seeing a train is perfectly clear. That was one excited, train-obsessed boy. Who grew up to be one excited, train-obsessed man.

I truly believe that as “man hobbies” go, train obsession is about as innocuous as it gets. But I do have to admit two things: First, I didn’t miss the train obsession at all, at the end of that relationship.

Second, it feels a little strange to have this unexpected and frequent reminder of a relationship that was probably the most difficult of my life. Certainly it’s the relationship that cost me the most, and changed me the most. On the one hand, I love where I am in life, so I can’t really regret the journey. And the choo-choo man is a good guy. But it was the wrong relationship in so many, many ways, and I damaged so many of my friendships while I was in it.

So yeah, I wish Noah stayed all about the airplanes. But he’s not, at least right now. Right now, he’s all about the choo-choo. And I am all about supporting his interests. I guess the good thing is that if he stays train obsessed, I’m already familiar with the lingo and the supplies. Too bad for Noah, our house has no basement that could be converted in its entirety to a model railroad.

I’ve blogged some about my unusual high school experience, and my thoughts leading up to reunion, but I haven’t blogged about the Rufus King High School Class of 1987 reunion itself yet.

My thoughts about it are kind of scattered and surreal, much like the experience itself. Incidentally, someone I knew in high school, but don’t think I ever saw that evening, did an radio show bit about it the next week. (The first half is mostly about beer.)

There are a bunch of people I still see or otherwise communicate with on a regular, if not as much as we’d like, basis. Some from my class, some from the few years ahead or behind mine, most who don’t blog or otherwise have websites.

Seeing those people who were able to make it or who live in Milwaukee, and their spouses and children, was wonderful. Only hearing Noah say Grandma and Grandpa was better, for the whole trip.

The real point, I think, of high school reunions, is to see and talk with the people you aren’t still in touch with regularly. And that was fabulous.

Thoughts (last names omitted, in case they want to protect their privacy):

I wish I’d been able to talk more with the organizers, Heather, Terri, Michelle, Craig, and Geneva.

I talked to a few of my old neighbors, like Steve, and people I knew all the way back to kindergarten, like Heidi. Why do you suppose we didn’t speak to one another in high school?

It was so wonderful to catch up with Colleen and her husband Mike. I wish we’d had more time together. I love that Jill calls her “smokin’ hot Colleen.”

One of the funniest moments of the evening for me was standing with Colleen and John, talking about Mike Cudz*?, with whom John is still friends. Colleen and I both liked Mike in the 8th grade, which put something of a strain on our friendship. Alas, Mike did not feel that way about me, and his “going with” Colleen didn’t last terribly long either.

As Colleen drifted away from the conversation and Judy drifted in, we told her that we’d been talking about Mike. She announced that he’d been her first kiss, back in middle school also. John and I cracked up, and I hope John has given Mike a lot of shit about that particular segment of the evening.

Most flattering moment for me? Robert said something to the effect of my being one of the top five girls he wished he would have asked out but didn’t. What a sweet and brave thing to say; I feel badly that we didn’t really wind up talking after that. And for the record, I probably would have said yes. I still remember hanging out after school at the library in 7th grade, and having a lot of fun.

Seeing Jeni, Tracy, Megan and Clare brought back so many memories, mostly younger than high school — elementary school and middle school. Katie, I so wish you could have been there with us. (Although really, you would have had to come to my parents’ and caught up with the whole family over more time.) Becca, you too! And Kelly & Shannon, the rest of the 5th grade posse.

Robin looks amazing! And she works for Noggin/The N, and has a toddler near Noah’s age. Even though we didn’t hang out a lot in high school, there was always a connection — her brother managed my Dad’s first Congressional campaign in 1982.

Tracy (the other Tracy) looks amazing too. I don’t think we’d connected in several years, and she’d lost tons of weight.

One of the most fun people to reconnect with was Michelle N, who has a cochlear implant! In high school, she was an amazingly articulate lip-reader and brilliant student. Now she hears well enough to have a conversation in a loud bar, and has a great career as a family practice & obstetrics doctor.

Incidently, Michelle, if you read this, did you know that your old neighbor Erin who went to University School is one of my closest friends? I don’t think she and I realized we both knew you until I was telling her about reunion and mentioned you by name. Her sister Clare is over there in the blogroll, and if you leave a comment, I will send you her email address.

It was great catching up with Dr K and hearing about his new adventures launching an IB elementary school.

Kimberley married a fellow King alum, but only 3 years ago, and now they have children just older and just younger than Noah. That was a fun conversation!

Dave, I did have the errand-for-Richard conversation with Carrie that you asked me to try to have. Give me a call and I’ll tell you all about it.

Regrets: Sad that Dave & Liz weren’t there with the rest of our buds. Sad that Eric & Otter didn’t make it and that I’ve completely lost touch with him. Sad that we didn’t get to catch up with Dr Stark during the trip.

There were so many people I talked with briefly — I don’t even want to start naming names because I’m sure I’ll forget half of them and then I’ll feel terrible. The amazing thing was how great people looked!

I think Jill had fun talking with Meredith, Gina, Eric, Dave, and Karen, all spouses who were wonderfully supportive and tolerant of our reunion ramblings.

I can’t wait for the 25th. The only thing I hope is that we have a few more activities, and a few that are quieter, like a picnic or school tours early in the day, so there’s more time to catch up.